Personal

Seems like the day before yesterday!.

My dog Sally, my Pop, me, my Mom.

                    May 2000                                                                              September 2004

Vital Stats
Age (chronological):
over 40
Emotional Age: less than you'd like (permanently) and more too
Astro. Sign: Virgo (do you care?)
Astro. Prefs: I love Venus when she's out at night, Mars when he's near, Orion on a wintry night, and the Pleaides when I can see them (if you can see any double entendres here, you can see more than I initially intended)
Sex: Male (with a few female tendencies like little interest in spectator sports)
Height: 5'9 1/2" (176.5 cm.)
Weight: 162 lbs (74 kg.)
Altitudinal Density: 2.3 lbs. per in. / .42 kg per cm
Belt: 34" - 35"
Exercise: I walk a lot, 3 - 6 miles / day, I ride a bike, 5 miles / day, and I swim 30 minutes / day.
Hair: yes, full-head of, naturally gray, short by barber & choice (see above)
Eyes: blue, "corrective lenses"
Smoker: not for 20 years
Drinker: rarely, and only socially
Ethnicity: Caucasian Jewish
Religiosity: spiritual atheist, with a belief in Magic, Mystery & Myth
Geography: raised on Long Island, NY (Woodmere & Hewlett); lived in New York City as a single & after; live in Metairie, suburb of New Orleans
Intellectual gifts: Mathematics, Logic, talk, perpetually curious, solid values, honest, others
Formal Education: M.A., English Literature
Work: (independent) Systems/Programmer Analyst (Consultant); PC Instructor; writer; tutor; market trader
Family Life:
Part 1: my father had three wives; the 1st gave him a son and a daughter; the 2nd gave him me; the 3rd gave me a step-brother.  Pop survived the 1st two who died very young; the 3rd survived him and is still kicking, thank you (no longer, 2005).
Part 2: I have gotten married once, in 1970 and have a son and a daughter from this union; I have been on my own since 1986.

Tastes
Food:
I like all cuisines except English and German (if these folks knew how to cook, I'd love their food too).  I would be a vegetarian for my heart's health but I like every food except: mushrooms, eggplant, soggy bread, tongue and tripe.  My favorite cuisines are Indian, Italian and all other Mediterranean (Greek, Turkish, etc.).  My favorite foods may be chocolate, olive oil, salted nuts, spices, etc.  If you'd like to recondition me to love food that's actually good for me, I'd welcome it.
Television: I pretty much do NOT watch TV (I believe that most of TV is created to lull people into a numb contentedness).  Notable exceptions: Nightline and Politically Incorrect (both gone, no TV).
Movies: I love movies and I love the shared movie experience.  Movies are America's secular church.  And for the most part they preach OK stuff.  A random bunch of favorites includes: Lord of the Rings, Seabiscuit, Casablanca, Dances with Wolves, Star Wars, Picnic, Jurassic Park..
Music: I adore music.  The music genres I love the most are folk and classical, classic rock, some jazz, and "world music."  And the best contemporary pop, if the truth be known.  I don't like homogenized, "background" music.  Favorites are: Dylan, Eros Ramazotti, Gipsy Kings, Enigma, Prokofiev, Rachmaninoff, Gershwin, Coltrane, Irvin Mayfield, Dvorak's New World Symphony, Beethoven, Ave Maria.  I love live concerts.
Books: I love books.  I am a reader of books, more than of newspapers and magazines (my time perspective is longer-term than most Americans').  I prefer dead authors, as I am a slow reader who knows my limits (I can't read everything that looks interesting, so I  choose books that have stood at least a minimal test of time).  I do NOT finish a book unless it demands I do so (the job of a good writer; many good writers are terrible writers).  Favorite or at least important books have been: Moby Dick, Daniel Quinn's Ishmael, Joseph Campbell.  My choices in books over the past ten years has been heavily weighted toward science and history.  My personal Heaven includes a BIG bookstore, a gazillion books and a comfy chair (that's always there for me).
Dance: I love to dance.  I love dance as part of Courtship, but I haven't done that in a while.  And I'd love to have a partner who loved to dance and would practice with me.

Values
Personal: Honesty.  I am my brother's keeper.  Freedom & Responsibility.  Science & Soul (not the way most folks think of it)
Foibles: wishing people weren't as stupid, superstitious, ignorant, foolish and arrogant as they are (at least Americans)
Politics: I call myself a Liberal but so much has changed since I loved that label.  I believe in individual rights, social welfare and government playing an important role in shaping society for the better, if only by locking up bad and powerful people who have acted irresponsibly toward their betters (citizens and consumers).  That is, I am in favor of LONG jail sentences for politicians who betray their public trust and for men of power and wealth whose self-aggrandizement is at others' expense.
I am (was, when I last lived in NYC) an Earth & Space Explainer at the American Museum of Natural History's Rose Center in New York City.  I am committed to all Americans having an adequate grounding in and love for science (physical, biological and evolutionary) and scientific thinking, for the salvation of our democracy, and of our souls.

Big Beliefs
GAIA
Perspectives
These are BIG, and I have written on them, but it'll take a while before they're ready for prime-time here.  Ask me.

What I Want in a Woman
She should be smart, smart enough to appreciate and enjoy my smarts, smart enough not to be intimidated by another person's smarts, and smart enough to keep me from not respecting her intellectual gifts
She should be beautiful, beautiful enough to keep the reptilian mind located beneath my waist interested (even agitated).  If your instinctive response to this requirement is that old standby, "beauty is in the eyes of the beholder," that's a bad beginning.
She should be sexy, sexy enough to want me in that reptilian way as much as I want her, and sexy enough to play me to our delight
Money: I need a woman who finds it immeasurably more important to take me to bed than to buy a new fur and add jewelry to her collection.  I DO want a princess, but not a foolish one who measures my worth, my love, and my importance to her by how much money we spend on her.
She should love food and know the difference between expensive food and good food.  It would be a real bonus if she were a vegetarian, loved to cook and loved to prepare tasty and healthful food (so we could grow VERY old together).  On the other hand, she should be real vain about keeping her tiny waist (mine too).
She should want to travel, whether she has a history of it or not.  Travel for me does NOT mean shopping in a foreign country, and it may mean pulling up roots and living in a great place for a while.  Traveling to big European cities for short vacations is like going to sleep in New York City and waking up in New York City the next day and going to SoHo for the weekend; not a bad thing, just not my idea of travel.  Real travel most particularly emphasizes the unique natural beauties of a place, the unique man-made beauties of a place, the people and the uniqueness of a culture.  And you should always fall in love, again, when you travel: with your partner, with the place, with a native.  Shopping ain't the reason to travel.
Chemistry: for me, I believe that "chemistry is all, the rest is details."  And that the chemistry quotient is dependent (for ME) on the first few items on this list.  And that chemistry can be turned on and off if one takes it for granted.

The woman fo me will not react to this laundry-list with "how can anyone live up to all those demands?"  Rather she'll think, "I like how he writes and what he has to say."

What I Want To Do with the next 60 Years
Come back soon, or bug me.  Whatever it is, I'll prefer doing it with a live woman!

What Else Can I Say?


Essays from an Internet (JDate) Personal:

More about me:  smart, deep, multi-level, intuitive, unusually sexy and sensual for an intellectual guy, interested in lots of things, a funny bone, a good listener, I could do a self-portrait stretching miles; I prefer not to. I have more between the lines than most guys have lines. Arrogant. Decent, kind, generous, sweet, tough, fun. Kissing can be more intimate than ... So can just touching. Don't get the wrong idea, I am not a eunuch! Opinionated as hell and still growing and learning. But PLEASE do NOT answer this ad without providing me a recent photo of yourself, as I no longer have time to respond to promises that "you won't be disappointed."
More about my perfect date:  smart, beautiful, sensual, sexy. Smarter than a beautiful woman will find useful but you just can't help it. More beautiful than a smart woman has a right to be, Lucky enough to have discovered that making love with the right person is as good as it gets and that's quite good enough thank you! Sexy enough to keep a man a man into his nineties (at least) Bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, curvy/shapely, small-medium bones, 5'2" to 5'6", 105 to 120#, vain about her looks, ex-hippie (?), bit of a princess (?), interested in lots of things, including the world and its condition, more interested in a guy's mind than in his bank account, not conventional - thinks for herself, loves good talk, needs passion in her life, her spirituality is moving in a direction that transcends conventional religious faith. I mean, maybe there's nobody who is all of the above; but you do need to be very smart and very pretty and ready to have a life that is not typical for US to be a good match On the other hand, I am pretty easy once my viscera have made up my mind for me that you're for me!
This is what I consider a perfect first date:  going for a walk on a spring evening while it's still light, dinner, talk, laughter, shared glances, not too intent on eating, enjoying each other's presence, a little touching, some sparks, walk some more, she taking my arm, not wanting the evening to end, actually, finally, being really interested in the other person, for the first time in ages, thinking, God, I hope I have a chance with her.
My perception of an ideal relationship:  love, touching, good communication and talk, mutual respect, loving loving, lots of reciprocal support, fun together, travel, adventure (planned and unplanned), a boundless unknown future.
This is what I've learned from my past relationships:  Chemistry and Instinct are the most important things (for me) on the way into a new relationship. Being able and willing to listen (ego in check) are the most important things in a relationship. The relationship is the most important thing in a relationship. People are different. What you learned about, and from, someone else in the past may not count in this relationship. The most important thing I have learned in my years on this planet is not to take what i knew yesterday as gospel. And that you can't learn anything when you know it already. And that one of the best things about a great long-term relationship is ... surprise. And that the lucky one is the one whose love is so deep his/her heart can still be broken. And that perhaps happiness is not the most important thing in life, maybe, just maybe, honor, integrity, fidelity and courage (and even a sense of humor) and loving someone else are more important.

Essays from another Internet (Match) Personal:

How he describes Himself
Solo: I like to be out in the open air (may as well take advantage of Global Warming!) and walk, no matter where. I like to run when the feeling grabs me. I'd like fishing if I lived near a lake and owned a pole and hook. I love the Apple in all its extravagant manmade greatness and its excess of wonderful distractions. And people, especially in NYC, where everyone tries so hard. What a school this city is! Yet I yearn for the country, its clean, fresh air, sounds of running water, birds, crickets, and breezes, billions and billions of stars overhead at night. I like to think (image: don Juan in Heck). I like to read (mythology, GAIA-stuff, classical Lit, history, pop science, psychology, PC's, sci-fi and fantasy-fiction) and I like to write what's on my mind, essays or Journal entries. I have an MA in English Lit (yikes!) but I am interested in most everything that is, uh, interesting. I spend an extraordinary amount of time at the Amer Museum of Natural History / Rose Center for Earth and Space where I am a Volunteer / Explainer. I love movies for escape and inspiration. I enjoy lectures on a variety of subjects. I enjoy taking digital pictures. I like to work when I'm caught up in it. I like to be with friends, doing nothin' in partickler. I love music and silence. I like other people's pets. And I like to imagine I grow a little up each day to counter the growing down. Together: make love. make love. laugh a lot. make love some more. I love travel (I have Greek Islands, Costa Rica and Africa in my future: interested?), wonderful (soulful if I'm lucky) talk, long walks, sharing space, feeling "there's nowhere I'd rather be and nothing I'd rather be doing" and "life doesn't have to get any better than this."
How he describes his ideal match
I am looking for a true beauty, one who knows that being beautiful is a gift she gives herself. And smart, she'd better be smart. Who knows that love and joy are more important than what you can buy and show off. Who has a face to fall in love with, a body to make me stand up straight, a mind to have fun with, a heart to treasure and a soul to inspire. I need a smart, beautiful, alive woman to interest me. And I will jump through hoops for her. And pamper her and be her best friend, confidant and lover. And make her (inner princess) laugh. Modesty aside, I have failures and flaws and baggage, but this advertisement for myself is not the place for THAT laundry list. I have a weakness for a woman who is nearly as smart and soulful as she is beautiful, is not (too) full of herself, and likes and values her man too. Chemistry, passion, joy, fun, laughter & tears, being fully alive! That's what this is all about, isn't it?

For those who are put off by how much I seem to emphasize the physical (beauty & sexiness), let me say that: 1) my writing (style and content) has no trouble attracting smart women who are not commissioned Real Estate Salespeople, and 2) despite my warnings that looks DO count with me (as they do with most men (and most women too)), I still get too many responses.  It is only my feeble attempt to be honest.  Most healthy men want these things, I do too.

mailto: davidkernabraham@hotmail.com